The Best Sheep & Goats

I was reading I Samuel 15 today. How this story strikes at my heart. God tells Saul to destroy the Amalekites down to the very last sheep, but Saul leaves the Amalekite king alive and his men only destroy the seemingly worthless things and kept the best cattle, sheep, etc. for themselves. When Samuel confronts him, Saul, in a truly human way, argues that he did obey God, even though he didn't obey God, because they kept the best animals for sacrificing to the Lord.

This passage of scripture is heartbreaking to me:

When Samuel finally found him, Saul greeted him cheerfully. “May the Lord bless you,” he said. “I have carried out the Lord’s command!”
“Then what is all the bleating of sheep and goats and the lowing of cattle I hear?” Samuel demanded.
“It’s true that the army spared the best of the sheep, goats, and cattle,” Saul admitted. “But they are going to sacrifice them to the Lord your God. We have destroyed everything else.”

How often do I do this? How often do I say, "I'm obeying God, but in this area where I'm clearly not obeying Him, it's because I am still serving Him. Truly. Honestly. I have a good reason." What are your sheep and goats? For instance, I wonder about this in regards to how I deal with money. Do I really believe in Jesus' way of poverty (Luke 12:13-34), or do I convince myself that I am better able to serve God by holding on to the money I have? Where is the line of a servant's responsibility (Luke 19:11-27) versus my sinful, Saul-like excuses that I need to save the good plunder for God instead of doing what He told me to do with it? I wonder.

Saul's actions lead God to reject him as king of Israel and to this beautiful verse:

What is more pleasing to the Lord:
   your burnt offerings and sacrifices or your obedience to his voice?
Listen! Obedience is better than sacrifice,
   and submission is better than offering the fat of rams.

God wants our obedience and submission. He does not delight in our sacrifices, but delights in our hearts when we show mercy and seek His heart (Matt 9:13; Hosea 6:6). How often do we instead stammer out excuses like Saul before Samuel, convinced that we somehow are doing something better for God than simply obeying Him?

Back again. I think.

My baby turns four months old today. It has somehow simultaneous been the longest and the shortest four months of my life. Every day is similar and as I pass day after day being at home with an infant, doing five thousand loads of laundry, I am somehow surprised to find myself in the middle of May. Perhaps the fact that it is still snowing is also playing tricks with my sense of time. Anyway, that is all to say that I am starting to settle into life with a baby and I am hoping to steal away for a blog post during a nap here and there. We will see how it goes. I make no promises!

Inspiration Board: Mint for Spring Fashion

Doublemint Fresh by sarahmaemoser featuring spike earrings

Blog Share: A Beautiful Mess

If you don't already follow this blog, do it. Projects, recipes, fashion, photography. They cover it all and they do it beautifully. It is the most inspiring blog I have ever stumbled upon.

A Beautiful Mess

Inspiration Board: Wood

I love wood. Seriously. Anything made out of wood will make me stop in my tracks and want it. Just look at all these beautiful things...

Clockwise from the top left:

• Random broken-link Pinterest pin
• Maasai Giraffe from Ten Thousand Villages
• Treehouse Fete Necklace from ModCloth
• Brentwood Pendants from West Elm
• Sisse Jonassen's Apartment from Design Sponge
• Kitchen Essentials from Calphalon Spoon Set at Target
• Wood Art Natural Edge Bowl from ShadyTreeCreations on Etsy

Thoughtful Thursday: Women's Bodies

When I was at my 38 week pregnancy appointment last week, the nurse-midwife looked at me and said, "We can begin sweeping your membranes at 39 weeks if you want." This is basically the first step in artificially inducing labor. I just stared at her. Why was she even suggesting this? I have had a textbook perfect pregnancy. I am healthy. My baby is healthy. Why would this even be suggested? It is a completely unnecessary medical procedure. More importantly, suggesting it subtly attempts to undermine my ability to trust my body to deliver my baby at the right time. Her reasoning was that some women just get impatient. Well, yeah, I can't say that having a 15lb squirmy medicine ball where my stomach used to be is particularly easy, but isn't it more important to encourage me to believe that my body is capable of triggering labor at the correct time for me and my baby?

Women's bodies are in incredibly complicated. Think about how complicated the human body is in general, and then add to the fact that women's bodies are actually designed to replicate, build and sustain another human body. Our bodies are complicated. Because of this, I have often felt challenged by my body. Between hormones and reproductive cycles and pregnancy, sometimes I feel like I have no idea what is happening in my body or how to respond to it. It can be incredibly frustrating. Yet, as I have traveled through this pregnancy, it can also be incredibly encouraging. My body is amazing in its capabilities. Truly amazing.

Unfortunately, I feel like Western medicine has bought in to this strange idea that women's bodies are perpetually broken and in need of fixing. Our bodies are viewed either as objects of lust or confusing mysterious machines that never work quite right. And there is also an utter disregard for our emotions and minds and how they affect our bodies. Lots of people will joke about how women are more emotional than men, but why aren't our feelings even a factor when discussing our bodies with doctors?

I've had conversations with two friends today who said yes to an optional (though recommended) medical procedure not because they were comfortable with the procedure, but because the doctors approached them with horror stories of what might happen if they don't go through with it. Western medicine operates out of the fear of what may be rather than having any faith that maybe if we just give a body a little time, it might do just fine. And the utter disrespect of their emotions was infuriating. We cannot disconnect how we feel from how our bodies are doing. They are always connected.

A friend once said that Satan hates women especially because we have been given the gift of bringing life into the world. As I look around at the body image issues and physical issues by which so many of my friends have been plagued, I think this is true. Our bodies and the image of them have been attacked on so many levels. How many women truly believe that their bodies are beautiful, incredible works of art and mechanics? Because they are. They are valuable for a lot more than sex (which is the only value our society seems to place on them these days). Our bodies are miraculous. It is a great tragedy that we have lost all sight of this.

Blog Share - Vintage Revivals

I literally just found this blog today, and I love it! It's fantastic. Today's project was very inspiring to me since I see these bits of embroidery and lace and quilts all the time and wonder how to update them. Doesn't this re-framed crewel work look amazing?

Vintage Revivals